Peer Reviews
Alexis Roberts - I really like your topic. I have heard a little bit about net neutrality, so I am looking forward to reading your paper. If you want to expand, you could start by explaining what net neutrality is, and how it will affect people. You could also talk mention that the Verizon Company and Google are for net neutrality. You should mention if any politicians have talked about it, and if it is on any political agendas.
Christa Murray - You have a great start to your paper. Really, there isn't much to comment on considering no one really wrote that much on their rough drafts but I think you have the right idea so far. I also wanted to tell you since you weren't in class yesterday that he said we can rearrange the format of our paper and in what order we put things, just as long as it makes sense. Be sure to put your citation before you explain what is being talked about in the site. Also, just a reminder to talk about the audience that would be most interested in your topic and to create an example of your own (I'm sure you knew that, but just reminding you!) Like I said, great start! It's due Friday at midnight, just so you know.
Rebecca McCall - That's an interesting topic. I didn't see an actual citation in there, but you have time to fix that. Christa already commented on the missing creative example (so our whole group is missing examples!). We'll fix it... eventually. Uh, what are the FCC and ISP? I mean, I have no idea what an/the ISP is, and the directive for the FCC isn't always clearly explained as it could be.
Christa Murray - This is definitely a great start to your paper. I liked the criquiting of the wesbite itself as well. I would suggest maybe even narrowing the topic of your paper down to one of the things you listed that the website provides about genre, like the tone of genre or something. Therefore, you can focus on that one aspect and perhaps give examples of that topic. Also, if you don't want to narrow down your topic, you could possibly give examples of different types of genres and when each should be used in certain situations. You could also provide links to other websites or different parts of your website that you chose that would help people looking at the website find other information about your specific and broader topic. If your audience is students, then remember to keep it short, which was another thing I liked about your paper. Also, I liked how the language in your paper is simple and easy to understand. Just think of what you would like and not like about a website about this topic if you were doing research on the subject. Also, if your audience is students, then you could try structuring your sentences where it seems that you are talking directly to the reader themselves and telling them the information instead of just in general.
Rebecca McCall - I like that you commented on how easy the page is to navigate. You could walk us through navigation of the page, so that readers don't have to waste time figuring it out. You could also tell us what the website looks like. It was nice to include that they are brief in explaining things, and you could give an example or two. I think that the first and second lines of the second paragraph could use a grammatical touch-up, which would also lengthen it. Or not. It made sense earlier. What are some of the personas that an author assumes, and what genres do they correspond with? What is there is well-written.
Joseph Michel - I think this is a really great start to your paper. I like the fact that it’s about Christen O’Donnell. It’s always fun to read about her and Sarah Palin. I generally get a good laugh out of those two. It would be nice if you maybe explained more about the Tea Party itself, like what their goals are and who their main representatives are. You could also talk about the pros and cons between Coon and O’Donnell. All in all I think this will be really good to read when it’s done!
Peer Reviews Review?
I really liked the whole peer review thing on buzz. It was very helpful as I think most of my classmates would agree. It was a nice way to get a lot of input quickly on your papers.
Christa Murray did a great job on both of the reviews she gave me. On almost all of the reviews she did, for other people included, she seemed to want to write a whole other paper about the other persons’ paper. Well not quite but she wrote a very large paragraph per. This was very helpful. One very good tip she gave me was:
“I would suggest maybe even narrowing the topic of your paper down to one of the things you listed that the website provides about genre, like the tone of genre or something. Therefore, you can focus on that one aspect and perhaps give examples of that topic. Also, if you don't want to narrow down your topic, you could possibly give examples of different types of genres and when each should be used in certain situations.”
She gave me two distinct paths to help me work down and focus my paper more. Rebecca McCall gave very helpful information also. She said “Uh, what are the FCC and ISP? I mean, I have no idea what an/the ISP is, and the directive for the FCC isn't always clearly explained as it could be.” I didn’t realize but I had forgotten to tell the reader who the Federal Communications Bureau was, along with Internet Service Providers. I quickly changed that, to include it, in my paper.
Alexis Roberts said, “If you want to expand, you could start by explaining what net neutrality is, and how it will affect people. You should mention if any politicians have talked about it, and if it is on any political agendas.” I thought it was a really good idea to talk about how the everyday person would be affected. I was already trying to integrate the whole political agenda thing, so it was nice to see that someone else thought it was a good idea too.